The End of a Year

The other day I was reading people’s New Year posts about how much they hated 2020 and were happy it was over. It made me feel really sad and I knew I disagreed, but I wasn’t sure why. It wasn’t until later when I was reading my journals from this year that I figured out why I disagreed.
I loved 2020.
I didn’t enjoy the turmoil. I didn’t enjoy the chaos. I didn’t enjoy being apart from so many people that I love. I didn’t enjoy the fear. I didn’t enjoy all the unknowns. If I could go back and tell myself in March that I was going to love this year, I think I would’ve thought I’d lost my mind.
Even now, I wonder at this madness of a thought:
I loved 2020.

Looking back on my journals from this past year, it’s oh so evident that God is SO good. The freedom to grow in my walk with Christ is something I wouldn’t change, or hate about this year. This year was necessary for me to step out of those comfort zones and learn what it means to fully trust. It’s like when a baby learns to stand on their own, and then their parent steps back and says, “Okay now, you’ve got to learn how to walk. I’m right here come to me”. Standing on our own two feet is an accomplishment in itself, but walking… Walking means movement. We go places we wouldn’t have gone if we stayed still. And when we get scared, or tired, or frustrated, or we trip and fall, we know that all we have to do is look to Christ, and go straight back into His arms. We were given such a promise in His name: Immanuel.
God with us.
He’s always with us. Through the turmoil. Through the chaos. When were alone. During the fear and all the unknowns, He is with us.
While people hate on 2020, I can’t help but feel overwhelming grateful at His perfect hand of provision, His deep love for me, and the great hope that Our God is.
I feel so grieved for those that can’t see how good God has been this year in their own lives, and I pray that they would be reminded of that as we start into a new year.